Dissolving Capsules, and Workout Updates
There’s been some gray area for me lately between capsules: my pajamas and workout gear are frequently overlapping, and both categories are seeping into my daytime wear. Now there have been many days where I’ve neglected to change into “real” clothes and just worn my pajamas all day. But I usually keep my workout wear and pajamas strictly separate. Blue pocket tees (4 of them) are for sleep, and gray tees (also 4) are for working out. But there has been a new development in my workout routine (or lack thereof) which is blurring those lines.
I had been walking on the treadmill in my office for an hour at a time rather sporadically over the past month or so. But then things ground to a halt once again and I barely moved beyond the couch or bed. I was overwhelmed at the thought of getting dressed in workout clothes, working out for a full hour, and then having to shower and wash said clothes.
I decided all of this would change on the first of the year, joining in the most cliched New Year’s Resolution there is: to start exercising every day. I decided to do a 30-day Yoga Challenge, and in addition would do one of the preset programs on the treadmill every day. I prepared, I researched, I laid out clothes. And on New Year’s Day, I did yoga. Now, I’ve done a good amount of yoga in my life. I’m experienced in working the classic poses. But being well over 200 lbs right now, I found yoga very, very different from when I was thin. My knees hurt, which is always a bad thing. I didn’t have the strength to hold myself up in downward dog or plank pose. And I had to keep stopping and resting during the warrior poses; my legs were shaking from bearing my body weight.
I finished the video 30 minutes later, despondent and hysterically crying. I felt so angry at this 90 lb waif touting “beginner” yoga with no regard for the fact that her students might not be 90 lbs as well. I flopped into bed and cried to my husband, a former ballet dancer, and he agreed that yoga teachers in general don’t seem to know how to teach people who are heavy, inflexible, or not already aware of their specific alignment needs. He talked me down, and suggested I rethink my fitness routine. We talked it over, and I decided I’d go with him to the gym every day where he works out for 15-20 minutes. He’d adjust the weights for me as we took turns on the machines, and we’d walk on the treadmills for 7 minutes. It was hard to see the point of such an easy workout, but a week into it, I’m starting to see the point. I’m way less overwhelmed at the thought of exercise, especially since the plan is to gradually increase the intensity without extending the time. So far, I know it’s definitely better than what I was doing before: absolutely nothing. It’s also getting me out of the house without really having to interact with other humans, a nice bonus. I just keep my hat and headphones on and never, ever make eye contact.
I think part of what’s working for me is:
I don’t bother wearing a bra- just a heavy fleece over my T-shirt
I wear my pajama T-shirt from the night before
I don’t usually sweat enough to warrant a shower
My workout pants can go a few days without being washed
One strange result of this new routine is that the clear delineation between my pajamas, workout clothes, and daytime clothes has all but disappeared. Right now I’m wearing workout socks and pants, a pajama top, and a pajama hoodie- and it’s the middle of the day. Maybe this dissolution of separate capsules is my own secret to regular exercise. Perhaps allowing my workout clothes into the rest of my life is making space for actually working out?