Bra Do-Over, Jeans, and Everlane Order

Okay, I realize this is pretty ridiculous, but I went back to Kohl’s and exchanged the bra I bought. Luckily I had snapped a photo of it with tags on, so I retagged it with my little tagging gun and it was as good as new. I exchanged it for a 40C in instead of the too-tight 38D, so up a band size and down a cup size. This does support (get it?) my theory that the two sizes are virtually identical, but in this case the right size became abundantly clear.

According to the experts, you’re supposed to start out wearing bras on the loosest hook, and then as they get stretched out over time, you progress to the middle hook and then the tightest. But I was wearing the 38D on the loosest hook yesterday and it still felt too tight, so rather than wait for it to loosen up over time, I decided to trade it in for the bigger band. In going up to a 40 band, the cup of the D became too big, so I went down to a C instead. Now, if anyone was paying attention to the last blog (and I honestly don’t blame you if you weren’t), you’ll remember that this is the exact size I was wearing to begin with. Like, the bras that were way too big. So, despite this being the same brand (Vanity Fair) and a very similar “Beauty Back” style, the soft-cup style fits where the foam-cup was huge. On my first round at Kohl’s, it never occurred to me to try on the same size I was already wearing. Call me crazy, but I assumed I had changed sizes. I apparently had not.

Rather similarly, I’ve been going through some rethinking when it comes to jeans. My latest pair, bought on Ebay, measure 38 inches in the waist even though the tag says they’re a 40 waist. The inseam was 30 on the tag but measures 27 inches, so I figured this discrepancy wasn’t a problem and they would fit great. But I’ve worn them a couple of times now and they just don’t look right. For some reason, despite fitting in the waist, they look huge. Even my old 38s (which measured 40 inches in the waist) looked better. Frustrated with the numbers, I pulled out the 36s that also measure 36 inches in the waist. They fit me perfectly- until I try to button the very top button. So I can either walk around with a significant muffin top (and trouble breathing), or I can just not button the top button. I decided to go with that: just don’t button the top button.

My husband and I designed and engineered a “button extender” composed of some flat elastic and a button. The button goes in the button hole, and the elastic goes around the jeans’ button. It looks a bit weird if you see it, but if I wear a belt or leave my shirt untucked, no one would ever be the wiser. I fantasize that one day I will wake up and the button will, well, button. But my weight loss has stalled and I don’t see it happening anytime soon. So I guess it’s good enough for now.

In other “news,” and I use the term lightly, I got my Everlane order in the mail. I got the Air Oversized Crew Tee in faded pink in an XL and the Japanese Oxford Square Shirt in white in an 8, a 10, and a 12. The 10 was the best fit (even though I’m more like a 14), but then I got really confused when I imagined wearing it with the rest of my wardrobe. Layering it with sweaters seemed impossible, and even jackets seemed tricky. The cut is just so wide that it’s hard to fit it under anything- even though that cut is exactly why I love the shirt so much. I soon realized that while it could be worn over a T-shirt or on its own, even putting on a coat would prove difficult. Sadly, I decided this was just too impractical for my current minimal wardrobe and I returned all 3 sizes. It’s really a shame, since the fabric was thick and substantial, plus the details were great- it had really cool long cuffs and was cropped just right.

The T-shirt, on the other hand, looked just fine. Oversized, as it was meant to be, and a color that’s not black or navy- thank goodness for that. I washed it before wearing it, but then after I wore it for a day, I decided the material just felt cheap. It brought me back to the last time I tried an Everlane T-shirt: I’d purchased the Cotton Box Cut Pocket Tee and rejected it because it just felt shitty. As in, my Old Navy and LOFT cotton tees felt way nicer, and my J. Crew T-shirts were light years better. I decided to keep this Air Tee since it was basically free (it was $25 and I had a $28 credit, so after the $6 restocking fee for the other shirts, it only set me back $3), but now I’m regretting it still. The color sort of gives it some points, but honestly, the fabric is so sleazy and artificial-feeling (despite its 100% cotton tag), I don’t know if I’ll even reach for it. Now, I understand the Air Tees are supposed to be thin, the way J. Crew’s Tissue Tees are. But Tissue Tees are incredibly soft, and the Air Tee is not. It feels like something you might find in a bin at a fast fashion store for $3, so I guess I got what I paid for. The quality of the Japanese Oxford Square Shirt was so good that I really can’t resolve this in my mind. But damn it, this T-shirt. I really, really don’t recommend it. If you’re as excited about Everlane as everyone else on the internet is, by all means spare yourself the agony and skip the T-shirts.